Butterfly (Open Thread)

[Rana Mau Abyssin]

"You will learn our customs, mau," he told him gently. "And I know that you'll make the right decisions, mau. You're my mate, mau. Can't you feel it?" He frowned a bit, reaching out to touch his face. "If you want, mau... I can bear kits, mau. You don't have to, mau." He patted his belly. "Wouldn't you want to have kits, mau? pretty, fluffy little kits?"

[annon]

Annon ran a weary hand through his hair, quirking an eyebrow at Rana wryly. "Always diplomacy isn't it? No matter where one goes it seems one cannot escape it." He sighed deeply, dropping his own hands into his lap watching Rana for a moment before continuing, rather pointedly avoiding the topic of kits entirely, too confused by the concept to even know what to say. "So what happens next then? I get a bunch of books to read? Formal lessons?"

[Rana Mau Abyssin]

"Well... You can have classes with the computers, mau, if you want." He was trying to think. He lay his head in Annon's lap to be stroked. "And just living here with us, mau, you'll pick up on some stuff, mau. Nadira can help you, mau, and my mommy too, mau." He sat up, looking at Annon with unadulturated love in his eyes. "Can I kiss you, mau?"

[annon]

Annon stared at Rana in his lap in surprise, not quite sure what to think, feel or even do about it. He was now rather furiously chewing on his lip, jerking in surprise at Rana's direct request to kiss him. He dropped his gaze, unable to hold Rana's. One of his hands was nervously picking invisible non existent lint off the chair. "Do I have to sit through more lectures?" He asked softly, pulling a face at the thought. He did so hate the formality of everything he had to do thus far wanting to be free and less formal but did not know how. He didn't answer the question about the kiss, not knowing what to say. Part of him wanted to say yes, another was telling him it was too much, too soon.

[Rana Mau Abyssin]

"No, of course not, mau." He nuzzled Annon's neck, though, pulling the boy into his arms. "I want to kiss you, mau." He took Annon's hands in his own, kissing them gently.

[annon]

Annon pulled his hand slightly back, half heartedly trying to get away while sending Rana's parents a pleading torn look. "Anou... Rana..." He said uncertainly, turning bright red, not sure what to say. From the moment of meeting this outrageous stranger, Annon had been torn. Torn between giving in to Rana and backing away from the sheer strangeness of it all.

(For anyone who doesn't know anou can be interpreted as um)

[Rana Mau Abyssin]

Rana was gentle with his mate, holding him as he kissed his throat. His mothers left them in peace, letting their kitten get better aquainted with his mate. He left many opportunities for Annon to break away, though, not wanting to hold him against his will.

[annon]

Annon's eyes widened in desperation when Rana's parents left. Annon felt horribly abandoned. He had hoped that Rana's parents would have helped him out of his current predicament. It now seemed that was not to be. Rana's parents had abandoned him to the crazy cat currently kissing his way up Annon's throat.

Annon was still fighting an inner battle. Part of him wanted to pull away, pull away from this practical stranger that seemed to be getting far to imitate with him while the other part of him, the wild rebellious side he rarely let see the light of day due to his father, wanted to just give in and let Rana do whatever he pleased, urged him to give in. Much to Annon's turmoil, it seemed the rebellious side was winning as he slid his eyes closed letting out a small sigh at the pleasure Rana's soft kisses was giving him.

[Rana Mau Abyssin]

Ran literally purred. He stroked his mate's hair, still kissing him. He nipped a bit at the other's throat, desperately wanting to mark him but way too afraid to scare away this new acceptance. He stroked down the boy's arms, then gently brushed his hands against his ribs. "You are my heart," he murmured.

[annon]

Annon flushed at Rana’s words. What on earth, or whatever other planet this was, did Rana mean he was his heart? The man barely knew him and certainly didn’t know things that were rather important if they were to establish a relationship.

Annon pulled away, his hand unconsciously moving towards his ear. “How can you say I am your heart when you don’t even really know anything about me?” He demanded, nervously fingering the arc.

[Rana Mau Abyssin]

"It is something we feel, mau," he said. "Can't you feel it too, mau? Knowing each other will come with time, mau. We will bask, mau, and talk and cuddle and learn what the other likes to do, mau, read, listen too... We will learn, mau."

[annon]

Something that was felt? People actually lived that way? Annon had long ago given up on paying any attention to his feelings. It wasn’t as if what he felt, what he longed for, what he wanted had ever counted for anything… His entire life had been lived according to responsibility and diplomacy. He had to do what was expected of him.

If he really thought about it, he felt a tug drawing him towards Rana. A tug he knew not how to deal with and so he chose not to think about it. Rana wanted to know him, this scared Annon. Only one person really knew him and that person was far away right now. Annon struggled to be himself, he was so used to playing the part of a diplomat’s son and what scared him the most was that he would be hated by anyone who really knew him. Satchi was a different matter. Satchi was a bit of a rebel one might say and so anything Annon did was mild compared to the things Satchi had done and lived. Satchi was the only one who really knew him and accepted him the way he was…

“And what if you don’t like what you find out?” Annon whispered. “What then?”

[Rana Mau Abyssin]

"Well, mau, no one can like everything about everyone, mau. So we learn to compromise, mau. But you can't hate everything about everyone, mau. Especially not in your mate, mau. We are mates for a reason, mau. So the good things are so good, mau, that the bad don't seem bad, mau. No one can be perfect, mau. I don't want you to be perfect, mau. I want you to be you."

[annon]

Annon stared at Rana in disbelief. Did Rana actually think he was going to like Annon simply because there appeared to some kind of strange attraction between them? That was bordering on INSANE! If there was one thing that Annon knew, it was that he was nothing but an ambassador’s son and would never be good for anything but being an ambassador’s son to be used to further future relations with whomever his father chose. What on earth was he doing away from that? Why had he rebelled?

Annon pulled the coat he was still wearing closer, hiding the suggestive clothes he wore underneath, and hiding all signs of his rebellion. He watched Rana out of jaded eyes. “Unfortunately life does not work that way. It never has and never will.” This was stated with resignation and finality.

What would Rana think when he saw the tattoo… what would Rana think when he figured out what he was hiding? Imperfections no one alive except for Satchi knew about. Imperfections he had spent his entire life since his mothers death hiding. Annon missed his mother. She had known. She had known about all his flaws and loved him anyway. She had helped him hide the flaws from his father, protected him and taught him how to survive in a world that was uncaring and cold. He missed her warmth, acceptance and love very much. This sudden reminder caused hurt to course through him and tears to gather in his eyes. Tears he would never let fall. Crying was a flaw.

[Rana Mau Abyssin]

Mau gathered him close, purring and cuddling. He stroked Annon's face. "I frightened you, mau," he murmured softly. "I'm sorry, mau." He kissed Annon's forehead gently. "Life does work that way, mau. You see my mommies, mau? That happened to them. Rika-mama and Tara-mama are very different, mau. One is very hissy and evil and fun, mau, the other is conniving and mostly nice, mau. They never thought that they'd like each other, mau. But when Tara-mama claimed her mate, mau, they knew they'd always be together, mau. And they'd love each other no matter what, mau. Even if Tara-mama was the daughter of a rich merchant, mau, and Azrika-mama was the daughter of nobody, mau. Mating works that way. You are mine and I will love you no matter what. So mau."